Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door

personal  Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door source

This is my second time writing this post.

I wrote a first draft last week and had to scrap the whole thing because it sounded too much like a “Dear John” letter.  Or a “I give up blogging” letter.

The fact of the matter is—I am not breaking up with anyone. 

I am not shutting down this blog.

I am not going to stop writing.

I am not giving up.

I am in it for the long haul.

Truly, I am.

But that doesn’t mean that I don’t feel lost right now.  Because I do. 

LostConfused.  Adrift.

personal  Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door source

This goes beyond feeling burned out.  Yes, like every other blogger out there, I have gotten burned out on occasion.  But I have barely posted in the last few months and that is not because I am burned out.

It is because I don’t know what Beautifully Invisible is anymore. 

I somehow lost my focus and, with it, misplaced my writing skills.

I feel like I have no direction anymore.  No purpose.

I tried to come up with an editorial calendar that could help me work through this slump, and you know what happened?  I couldn’t fill it.  Because I don’t know what I want to write about.

Nothing seems to excite me right now.  Except TOM FORD.  And sparkly baubles.

Anyone who has followed me a long time knows that I tend to write lengthy posts.  I don’t do that because I want to break sacred blogging rule #1 (keep it short!); I do it because I have an opinion I want to share.  A voice that I want to be heard.

Lately, though, I just feel like I have nothing to say. And you know what?

It is driving me bananas!

But, literally, every time I try to write something it turns into this: scenario:

personal  Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door source

Scary, right?

I finally figured out exactly why this happens.

I have this idea in my head that my readers—my dedicated, faithful, readers—want me to write posts with substance.  They don’t come to Beautifully Invisible to see what I am wearing.  They don’t come here to see what my latest purchase was or to see what I think the next big trend will be.  That is not what this blog is about.  They come here to read my opinions.  My thoughts on the latest controversies.  My blogging tips.  My ramblings about fashion.

But lately, whenever I try to write something like that, I feel like this:

personal  Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door source

Sure, I can write a post about some of my rings.  I can share a photoshoot that caught my eye.  I can even ramble on about some of the things I am coveting at the moment.

But when that is all I am capable of doing I feel like a failure.

Because I am more than that.

And this blog is more than that.

The problem is, right now I don’t seem to know what it—or I - am.

I decided to write this post because I want people to understand why I have been so silent these last couple of months. It has been easier to step away then to try and force something that just wasn’t there. The problem now is, I want to come back and I seem to have taken a wrong turn somewhere along the way.

personal  Getting Personal: Every Wall is a Door

This is going to be a time of transition for this blog.  Maybe it’s time to take it to the next level, I don’t know.  What I do know is that something has got to give.

I hope you will bear with me as I try to get back on track!  Hopefully, when that happens, things will be better than ever!

{ 21 comments… add one }

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  • blahblahbecky.co.uk December 26, 2011, 1:04 PM

    Take some time out, we’ll be here when you’ve got your inspiration back :)
    blahblahbecky.co.uk latest blog post: Recipe: Gingerbread Men

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  • Metsy December 22, 2011, 5:45 PM

    I am sorry to hear you’re struggling with transition. And I totally get that frustration. I am rebranding my blog and trying to figure a direction… and setting the bling blog aside for now because my blog partner has stepped back. All will be ok… but it’s all difficult. I don’t like making mistakes, but I need to allow myself to make mistakes to move forward.

    Back to you… You are amazing. I can’t wait to see what you do in the future. What can I do to help you my dear?
    Metsy latest blog post: Instagram Recap: A Few of My Favorite Things at Christmas

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  • The Youtube girl December 21, 2011, 4:02 PM

    I just have to mention that animation with the bird. Haha it’s so supid :). What kind of bird is that? Sad to hear about your thougts. Hope things will be better soon.

    Reply
  • Heidi/The Closet Coach December 21, 2011, 11:51 AM

    I hear you! Transition, she’s a b*tch ;)

    I don’t have any words of wisdom. But this blogger does: http://www.fluentself.com/blog/stuckification/destuckification-101/ She’s got great stuff about getting stuck and getting inspired and everything in between.

    Good luck!
    Heidi/The Closet Coach latest blog post: Outfit post: Earth tones for late fall

    Reply
  • Jamillah December 21, 2011, 8:10 AM

    Oh friend. Hug, big, big hug. I know it may feel like a pitch black room and you’re trying to get out of by clawing at the walls, but don’t fret there is a door somewhere in there and I know you will find it. REALLY don’t bang your head against the wall and don’t beat yourself up for it. Whatever you decide to write about I know it will have a lot of integrity and amazing. Take as much time as you need to continue to love every post you write, b.
    Jamillah latest blog post: I Heart the Internet-Be a Busy Bee

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  • The Style Confessions December 20, 2011, 11:27 PM

    Well, I’ve totally missed you! Do you know we started blogging at about the same time but your blog became really popular right away. (I’ve always been kind of jealous.) But your writing is so good and the topics you write about have been really interesting, so I can understand the popularity.
    Recently I wrote a mission statement for my blog, which sounds like such a cliche. However, knowing what my blog is supposed to be doing has really helped me decide what to post about. It keeps me focused and inspired. If you haven’t done it you might want to try. It could help.
    The Style Confessions latest blog post: Four More Fabulous Lipsticks for the Holidays

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  • Kimberlee December 18, 2011, 12:49 PM

    Aww I think our blog’s are supposed to evolve with us…so it’s okay if you want to revamp or take Beautifully Invisible on a different route. It’s your blog! Don’t stress yourself out too much :)

    Reply
  • clara turbay December 18, 2011, 8:48 AM

    Stunning blog keep doing it!

    Reply
  • THE-LOUDMOUTH December 18, 2011, 12:59 AM

    For the record, I don’t care what you choose to write about — I’ll still adore you and your blog. Don’t feel pressured to write about something specific or to continue the pattern that you’ve had for the year or so you’ve had this blog. It’s okay to change and experiment with different topics.

    I’m having the opposite problem. I have plenty to write about, but now that I’m working 50+ hours per week, I no longer have the time to devote to my blog. I’m super concerned that I won’t become as successful as I want to be because of this and it’s extremely frustrating.

    We’ll get through all this together.
    THE-LOUDMOUTH latest blog post: I’m shopping for free (and you can, too!)

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  • Jenmarie December 17, 2011, 9:54 PM

    Take all the time you need, girl. I KNOW you will get through this rough patch. Just know you won’t be losing any followers. You and your blog are much too amazing :)

    Reply
  • Joy December 17, 2011, 11:01 AM

    Be strong! I know what you must be going through right now, and it’s kind of happening to me too. As the year winds down I kind of want to give a good last shove and start the year with some momentum, but I also want to start be more specific on the kinds of topics I want to cover. I wish there was someone who could come to the blog and be like: THIS IS KIND OF THINGS YOU WILL BE TALKING ABOUT and be done with it. I don’t want to be an outfit a day kind of fashion blogger, nor merely sharing the newest collection but have something to say/critique etc. I don’t know, but I get you and don’t feel like you’re alone in this <3
    Joy latest blog post: Tagged!

    Reply
  • GRIT & GLAMOUR December 15, 2011, 11:25 PM

    I’d say I know how you feel, but my own absence on Twitter, my blog, and commenting on everyone else’s blog probably makes it pretty obvious that I’m a little burned out myself. Don’t beat yourself up about it. Do something when it feels right, when it comes to you!
    GRIT & GLAMOUR latest blog post: A few of my favorite things…at CURRENTLYOBSESSED.ME

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  • Alexis Grace December 15, 2011, 12:50 PM

    B—- you will find your voice, although I suspect it may not be too obvious right now.

    Thank you for sharing where you are at— that in itself is courageous and I don’t doubt, helpful to many of your readers.

    I am excited to follow your transition!
    Alexis Grace latest blog post: Perfect Party Dresses

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  • MJ December 15, 2011, 10:10 AM

    *Big, big Hug*

    It is perfectly okay! You need times like this (as crazy as this sounds!) because it gives you the opportunity to look at the world around you with a new set of eyes. It sounds to me that you may be suffereing from lack of inspiration and when that happens you have to flex that creative muscle, go to places that you normally wouldn’t go with a pen and paper and just write whatever comes to mind. Never mind if its not fashion related. As a matter of fact, it may be better if isn’t. Explore the other loves of your life, be it art, movies, music, whatever! Take this time to get back to things your life that may have taken a back seat because of the blog. That’s what I try to do when I’m feeling really stumped and don’t know what to say – I work on a lot of writing projects outside of my blog and fashion and it gets hard to be creative and write something everyday all day. So I’ll watch my favorite movies, take a little road trip, chill at the beach, hang with friends – all of the non blog things that I normally don’t get to do. It’s amazing how that idea comes to you when you’re not even thinking about it! :)
    MJ latest blog post: Fierce Holiday Gift Guide: The Accessory Addict

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  • Katy December 15, 2011, 4:00 AM

    B – I completely understand what you are going through. It’s difficult to be at this point where you feel like you took a wrong turn and can’t figure out how to turn back and find the right path. I wish I had some amazing words of wisdom – but I don’t. Just know your readers will be here waiting patiently for you to figure things out and jump back in. You’ll work through this and come out a better blogger in the end.
    Something I do when I’m blocked as a freelancer is to take a notebook, no computer in sight, sit in a favorite coffee shop or book store and just start taking notes. Things you like, things that tick you off, subjects you love, blogs you hate, whatever. It might help to get the thoughts flowing without feeling the pressure to blog. Good luck lady!! – Katy
    Katy latest blog post: Boston Blogger Holiday Fiesta – recap

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  • Rocquelle December 14, 2011, 8:54 PM

    Aw B! I totally understand this feeling; I hit it rather early in the short life of Consider Me Lovely. Take your time to discover what you want Beautifully Invisible to be, and we will be waiting!
    Rocquelle latest blog post: Midday Quickie- I Am No Mary Jane Girl

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  • bonita December 14, 2011, 8:23 PM

    ~ * ♥ * ~

    I am totally feeling you there B, I basically do the same thing at the moment. I don’t have anything to say? Ok, I’ll just ignore my blog then…. I think that the problem is not so much that I don’t want to blog, like you, but rather there seems to be a lack of good content to blog about. It’s like I’ve done so much blogging over the last year and a half that all the good topics I want to cover are gone!

    Which can’t be right…. Anyway, all the best for finding your blogging mojo, I’m sure you’ll figure it out! I’ll just be over here, looking for my own direction….. :D

    xox,
    bonita of Depict This!
    ~ * ♥ * ~

    Reply
  • Cate December 14, 2011, 6:18 PM

    ugh. i had this moment over the summer. hell, i’m STILL having this moment, and i’m pretty much taking the same approach. i’d rather not post than post something that doesn’t quite feel RIGHT. i have missed you though, and i remember checking on you once or twice to see if you were ill! hopefully you find your way soon because there’s be a huge void in the blogosphere if you left.
    Cate latest blog post: Editorial: Karlie Kloss by Steven Meisel for Vogue Italia

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  • Bella Q December 14, 2011, 3:53 PM

    I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. Which is funny because we’ve never met, are blogger pals but you’ve been quiet as of late, except about Tom Ford, lol. But I get it. I get this post. and the reason why I keep coming back to this blog is because I feel YOU GET ME. Your opinions but you often times phrase things that I am feeling but you say it sooner, and funnier and better. I know exactly where you’re coming from, because I’m there too. Only I’ve got outfit posts to fill in, and blog about. But I get it. Thanks for writing this. And I am confident your honesty is going to push past that block and open up the avenue to why you’re here in the first place.
    Bella Q latest blog post: outfit post: Double Pin-Striped & the LBD

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  • Lauren December 14, 2011, 3:43 PM

    Can I just say that I know exactly how you feel? I don’t want to quit style blogging necessarily but it just doesn’t seem to be that important to me anymore – yet I still like the inspiration and pushing of my creativity that my blog has brought into my life. I’m going through a process of thinking WHY I blog in the first place – is it for me or for others and should I keep on going with it? I think I will keep on with it but in a different and more freeing way than I feel like it is right now.
    Lauren latest blog post: Sometimes, It Just Comes Together

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  • Ashe @ Dramatis Persoane December 14, 2011, 3:11 PM

    LADY! God, I could have written that post. After 4.5 years at Dramatis Personae…. I get this. All of this. My readers come for one thing. But a lot of times I want to write something else. They don’t seem to respond to the lighter, fluffier, fun pieces– the ones that sometimes I enjoy a lot to write. They want a certain thing, and I can’t provide it as often as I need to.

    I actually started a 2nd, unlaunched blog, thinking maybe I can split myself between the two. A place to share the frilly, fun, shopping, spending, playful stuff… and leave DP for the other side of me. But then I think, “Do I want to start over?”

    I’ve even redesigned it, thinking that could help me move DP towards what *I WANT* it to be… but then time gets consumed and I feel directionless…

    If you ever want to e-chat about all of this, let me know. You ain’t alone! xoxo
    Ashe @ Dramatis Persoane latest blog post: 20 Bitchin’ Holiday Traditions to Adopt

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