Have I mentioned how much I love Friend Friday?  I really, really do.

Joining this group was one of the best moves that I have made since I began blogging last July.   Katy Rose of Modly Chic created something very special when she began this group.  Not only is the Friend Friday group a supportive community, it is also an invaluable resource.

• The topics cover a wide array of subjects that can be fun, educational, inspirational, thought-provoking and even controversial.
• The participants are some of the brightest, nicest and most talented bloggers out there today.
• I learn something new every. single. week.

This week was no exception to the above.  The topic selected is one that will impact just about every single blogger out there unless they are purely a hobby blogger: striking a balance between your blogging and the rest of your life.

Image via Beautiful Existence

This is something that I have admittedly struggled with, especially in recent months.  More than a few times I have thought of throwing in the towel.  More than a few times I have thought “this is it – I can’t handle this anymore.”

When this first happened it was simply due to blogger burnout caused by lack of time.  There weren’t enough hours in the day to fit blogging into my busy life.   So what did I do?  I took a step back and re-evaluated.  I made some changes and realized it was OK not to post everyday and it was OK to step away completely when I needed to.  I still realize that.

So, why did thoughts of quitting begin swimming in my head again more recently?  It wasn’t until I began writing this post that I figured it out.  It wasn’t due to burnout.  No.  Not burnout.  It was because I was disappointed.

I was disappointed in myself and the time (or lack of) that I was dedicating to this blog.  There are so many things that I want to do with the blog this year (see question 5 below)… and as the weeks pass by I feel like I am not accomplishing any of it.   Being the ambitious perfectionist that I am, that just isn’t acceptable.

Image via John Crowther Blog

In this case stepping back isn’t what I need to do.  What I need to do now is get organized… and this week’s Friend Friday questions helped spur me into action!

1. When it comes to prioritizing your life, in what place does blogging fall? Blogging clocks in right after my career on the priority list, but it is a very close race between those two.  I think it goes without saying that there are more important things in each of our lives than blogging or our careers or our hobbies.  Things like the people we care about and their – and our own –  well-being.

Image via Google Images

That being said, my career ranks pretty high on my list of priorities and blogging is within passing distance.   When I am passionate about something I give it 110%.  When I lose that fire, I also begin to lose interest, and that is the precipice I am standing on right now.  On one side is my career, which I still care deeply about, but after 9 years I have started to yearn for something new.  Something different.  Something more challenging.

Enter blogging.  It may not always seem this way to my readers, but I put my heart and soul into this blog and into building relationships with my readers and fellow bloggers.  Blogging, and everything related to it, excites me.  Challenges me.  Inspires me.  That is why it is quickly climbing up my priority ladder.

2. We all wish we had more free time to dedicate to blogging and all it entails. What are your tricks for taking advantage of the time you do have to be as productive as possible? I wish I had some words of wisdom to share here.  The truth is I don’t have any tricks because I am still trying to sort out the best way to manage my time and still dedicate 110% to this blog.

Image via Life Without Baby

Lately my typical day has gone something like this:

• 6:15AM – wake up
• 7:45AM – drive to work
• 8:30 – 7:00PM – work
• 7:45PM – arrive home and eat dinner
• 8:00PM – work out
• 8:45PM – relax
• 10:00PM – 12:00 (or 1:00)AM – blog activities
• SLEEP
• WEEKENDS: Friend and Family Time

I try to sneak in more blogging in time when I can – lulls at work, while I am relaxing, if I skip a workout,  but I haven’t figured out a magical formula that works for me.  What I do know is that I need to do something because I do have ambitions for this blog.  Big ambitions. But before I start burning the proverbial candle at both ends, I need to get organized or that candle will burn out faster than you can say “publish.”

Katy’s recent post “How to Blog More Often without More Time” gave me a few ideas that I am going to try to implement to see if that helps.   The one thing I am good at is keeping track of potential blog topics that pop in my head – the notes feature on my iPhone has been invaluable where that is concerned.

3. Have you discovered any short-cuts that makes blogging easier or more time efficient? As I mentioned above, my iPhone is a big help where keeping track of ideas is concerned.  It is also a life saver when it comes to emails and social media.   I do not, however, use it to read other blogs or reply to comments because I really prefer a larger screen for that.  I plan to purchase the iPad2 and hope that will make it easier to read and comment “on the run” so to speak.

Image via Google Images

Another thing I recently decided I need to try is an editorial calendar.  Joanne Faith’s post “How to Tame Your Blog With an Editorial Calendar” really made an impression on me and I think a calendar might be just the tool I need to finally get organized in a way I would like.   I plan to install the WordPress Editorial Calendar plugin this weekend, so we’ll see how that goes.

4. Do you have an editorial calendar or something similar that helps you plan ahead? As stated above, I do not have one at the moment.  My blog posts have been fairly spontaneous.  I write about what catches my interest at the time.  I have a very loose schedule that I adhere to for now:

• Monday: LINK LOVE with a TWIST Roundup
• Friday: Friend Friday

I used to do scheduled “Me Wants It” and “Whatever Wednesday” posts but I have come to realize that I like to be a bit more spontaneous than that.  In addition, certain topics I post about can’t really be scheduled (i.e. controversial subjects that suddenly arise).  That being said, I do have ideas that can be scheduled and researched, like this piece on corsets, and I could use an editorial calendar to keep me on track with those types of posts.

5. If time wasn’t an issue what you would be doing on your blog/for your blog that you aren’t doing now? Oh lordy, is this a trick question?  What wouldn’t I be doing might be a better question.  If I could put the time and energy I wanted into the blog I would be:

• Re-designing the site and header
• Tweaking the SEO details on all of my past posts
• Re-evaluating my tags and categories
• Researching and eventually adding an “advertise with me” page
• Building relationships with PR companies
• Building and/or strengthening relationships with fellow bloggers
• Building and/or strengthening relationships with blogging communitis like Independent Fashion Bloggers
• Publishing more tutorials and/or blog improvement tips
• Network, network, network!

What about you – how do you balance blogging and the rest of your life?  Is it an easy task for you?

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

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Image via Funny Cats

I am a self-admitted beauty product junkie.  It all started when I was a little girl.  I would watch my beautiful mother as she applied her makeup each morning.  At first I was fascinated by the faces she would make as she applied her mascara and lipstick, but eventually I was drawn to how her makeup enhanced her natural beauty.

Images via CartoonStock

This weeks Friend Friday questions focus on beauty and the products we can’t live without.  I have my beautiful mother to thank for my product addiction.  She never used a ton of products, and still doesn’t, but she always used just enough to move her from “mom” status to “most-beautiful-mom-in-the-world” status.  And who doesn’t want to be just like their beautiful mother?

Now, on to the questions!

1. What’s your favorite drug store makeup product and your favorite higher-end product? Somewhere along the line I became a make-up snob.  I wasn’t always that way – I used to be perfectly content with my L’Oréal and Cover Girl makeup.  Then, one day, I tried my first higher-end product and there was no turning back.

Today, there are actually few – if any – drugstore makeup products that do it for me.  You know the adoration that people feel for Maybelline Great Lash Mascara?  I don’t get – it flakes like crazy on me.   After a couple hours I look just like this little guy.  Only not as cute.

This is what happens when I wear Maybelline Great Lash Mascara. (Image via Flickr)

I have had similar experiences with other popular products.  Either the color pay-off isn’t as good, or it wreaks havoc on my skin.    The one drugstore product I truly love is actually from Target, and that is the whole line of Sonia Kashuk professional brushes (the ones with the black handle).  I adore them – they are just as good as any Bobbi Brown or MAC brushes I have tried.

Two of my favorite Sonia Kashuk brushes

As for high-end, I can’t just pick one favorite product.  I have a triumvirate that I can not live without: my MAC Studio Fix Powder.  This is a pressed powder with the coverage of a foundation.  No matter what other foundations or powders I may try, I always go back to this one.   Next is my YSL Volume Effet Faux Cils Mascsara.  ADORE this and never flakes on me!  Finally, my lipgloss.  Brands change, but currently I am loving my Josie Maran Argan lipgloss.   The argan oil keeps my lips moist and the colors are beautiful.

YSL Mascara, MAC Studio Fix and Josie Maran Lip Gloss

Honorable mentions go to Urban Decay Primer Potion – it is a MUST for anyone who ever wears eyeshadow – and the perfect pink of NARS Orgasm Blush.

2. Is there one type of product that is your go-to, can’t live without? My mascara is my go to product.  I will skip the powder and lipstick and blush on occasion, but I will never, ever skip my mascara.  I think my eyes are my best feature, so I love to play up my lashes as much as possible.  The YSL is my favorite, but I also adore tarte’s Lights, Camera, Lashes! Both do wonderful things for my eyes.

3. What’s the best hair product you’ve ever used? Hands down, MoroccanOil.  This is the stuff hair dreams are made of.  I raved about it briefly a few months ago here and my opinion has not changed.  When I started using MoroccanOil I was able to get rid of 90% of the other styling products I used.

The Holy Grail of all Hail Products

I have fine but thick hair, and all I have to do each morning is take a nickel size amount and run it through my damp hair pre-drying.  It protects my hair from the heat and makes it smooth and frizz-free.  The only other product I use is a volumizing mousse, and that isn’t even daily.  That is it – nothing else needed.   My hair has never been healthier and it smells unbelievable.  I swear the smell of this product is worth the price alone.  Seriously.

4. Fess up, what’s the worst beauty look you’ve tried to rock and look back at now with a little shame or apprehension that you actually did that? Is it bad that I actually don’t have a look I am ashamed of?  Most of my life I have actually gone for a more natural look.  You know, the “is she or isn’t she wearing makeup” look.  I never wore really crazy colors or caked my makeup on.  No Mimi moments for me.

Mimi from the Drew Carey Show (Image via BreBeauty)

The last few years I have actually gotten more adventurous with it and started experimenting more but the look is still more classic.  If I do up my eyes I keep my lips more neutral, and vice versa.  I did have a few scary hairstyles growing up, mostly due to out of control bangs that were at war with my cowlick, but who didn’t?

5. When it comes to beauty products, we all use the same basic products. What do you use that helps show off your personal flare and personality? This goes back to my eyes being my best feature.  As I mentioned above, I try to play up my eyes as much as I can.  Sometimes that is just with a heavy coating of mascara while sometimes it is with eye shadows (I can’t get enough of Bobbi Brown, MAC and Global Goddess shadows combined with the Urban Decay Primer Potion of course!).  I love by Urban Decay 24/7 Glide-On eyeliners – the colors are amazing and they STAY PUT.  My personal eye trick?  I line the inside of my eyes with a white liner – it makes them pop even more!

Yes, that is me. Baby steps, people. Baby steps.

What about you – what is in your makeup bag?

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

I am about to confess something that will likely leave some of you laughing, scoffing, or shaking your head at me and thinking “that poor, misguided woman.”

The single, most important reason that I love blogging as much as I do is because of the real friends I have made.

“Real friends,” you say?

“You mean those people who you have never met in real life,” you say?

“You mean those people who know nothing about your real life,” you say?

Image via cartoonstock

I say: yes, those people.

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t consider every blogger out there my friend. I don’t even consider every blogger I interact with a friend. I am not THAT crazy. But there are some that I feel I have truly connected with. Some that I know I would get along with beautifully in “real” life. Some that I respect and treat the same way that I would respect and treat a close friend. Some that have impacted my life more positively than some “real” friends have during the past year.

Does that make me crazy?

You might think “hell, yeah, that makes you crazy.”

I say, no, it doesn’t. Because each of these bloggers has bridged that great internet divide and given us a glimpse of who they really are through their content. Through their humor. Through their creativity and originality. They are warm and welcoming to each of their readers, and create an atmosphere that is inclusive, not exclusive.

Just as we are each drawn to the individuals in our “real” circle of friends for specific reasons, we are also drawn to certain bloggers for specific reasons. There is something about them that resonates with you – something that makes you feel a kinship with them.

That “something” is their authentic voice…. which just so happens to be the topic of this week’s Friend Friday questions!  So, let’s get on with it…

Photo taken/edited by me.

1. Most readers and fellow fashion bloggers value authenticity in the blogs they read. How would you describe blog/blogger authenticity? I described some of my thoughts about what makes a blogger “authentic” above, but I think the main element is this: they let their personality inform their content.

Bloggers with truly authentic voices are not focused on selling something. They don’t set out to impress their readers. They aren’t marketing themselves as “the next big blogger.” Instead, they focus on writing in such a way that is true to who they are as a person. As an individual. They offer unique and compelling content that is infused with personality. They don’t talk down to their readership and instead embrace them. It’s difficult to do that as a writer, but the bloggers with true “authentic voices” manage to do just that. They manage to sprinkle their posts with just enough personality that you feel like you are reading something a friend wrote.

2. When it comes to your blog how do you infuse it with that true/authentic feeling? Honestly, I am not sure how to answer this question. As an anonymous blogger I think it is a difficult thing to do because there are no visuals of me(for the most part!) to create that sense of familiarity. Instead, I have to do it solely through my writing.

I try to be real in my writing. I don’t write anything for the sake of getting hits or exposure. Instead, I focus on subjects that interest me. When I am passionate about something, the writing comes naturally, and I think the authenticity does as well. You can’t force authenticity – I am not even sure you can really explain it – it is either there or it isn’t.

I must be doing something right because I have received comments indicating that I do somehow manage to do this, including this one just this morning:

“i really want to commend you and your blogging skills. one of the things i adore is that you can make your blog *so* personal, and give us such a great idea of who you are, and yet you are anonymous. so many people can’t even do that when they’re sharing actual pictures of themselves.” – Kristy Eléna of Vogue Gone Rogue and Full Time Fabulous

Notice she doesn’t really say how I do it. I honestly believe that authenticity just is there (or it isn’t). I don’t try to be someone I am not… I just try to be myself.   If that doesn’t appeal to someone, they can move on to one of the other countless blogs out there!

3. Have you stopped following a blog in the last three months? What made you lose interest? I have actually stopped following quite a few recently, for various reasons:

• Due to sheer volume, I have decided to focus on “smaller” blogs and have stopped regularly reading most of the big guns (I still read them on occasion, though!).   There are so many talented bloggers in our StyleNation that it seems to make more sense to focus on the ones that are often overshadowed by the greats like Gala Darling and BryanBoy.
• There are certain blogs that, to me, appear to have shifted from true style blogs to marketing platforms for their respective owners.   Those are blogs that I stop following.
• Content, content, content: unique, unregulated content is key.  If that is lacking, I won’t be following.
• Aesthetics: I admit, there are certain blogs I stopped following simply because I couldn’t stand the way they look.  They weren’t user friendly at all.

4. We can’t communicate effectively on our blogs something we don’t live in real life… what are some ways you try to live an authentic life? How exactly does someone not live an authentic life?  Seriously – I can’t quite wrap my head around that concept.

I make no apologies for who I am.  Either someone likes me, and all my idiosyncrasies, or they don’t.  I refuse to change who I am for anybody, and if someone can’t handle that, they know where the door is.   I don’t pretend to be someone I am not .  Someone may not be privy to all the different aspects of my personality – I am complicated, I admit it – but they still know me.  I am who I am.

5. Give a shout-out… Which bloggers do you think are truly genuine and why? For all the reasons described above:

• A Brit Greek
• Bella of The Citizen Rosebud
• Casee Marie of The Girl Who Stole the Eiffel Tower
• Jemina
• Katy of Modly Chic
• Kristy Eléna of Vogue Gone Rogue and Full Time Fabulous
• Marissa of The Well Appointed Catwalk
• Vahni of Grit and Glamour

What about you – how do you define authenticity?

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

There is no doubt that 2010 has been an amazing year for me. In fact, when Beautifully Invisible went live in mid-June, my little brain never could have imagined what the next few months would bring. Four Links à la Mode features, Friend Friday discussions, various Blog Awards, and being named Grit and Glamour’s Blogger of the Year were just the icing on the cake (the very, very, very tasty icing!). The true highlight has been the wonderful connections and, dare I say it, friendships, I have made.

When I take a step back and reflect on everything that happened this year, it truly boggles my mind. I began this site with no prior blogging experience, and little idea of where I wanted this to go. Sure, I had some ideas and wild hopes, but truthfully, I went into it completely blind. I jumped, and hoped that I wouldn’t fall flat on my face. Thankfully, my face is still intact, and I feel like I have grown and learned more than I could have imagined in this short time period. 2010 was unforgettable, and I look forward to the new experiences and memories that 2011 will bring.

Image via Alpine Meadows Unfiltered

This week’s Friend Friday questions were suggested by Vahni of grit and glamour. Vahni isn’t the type of person who waits for January 1st to role around before she makes a change. Her passion for what she does is evident in her work and in her commitment to improving herself and her blog. It is only fitting that the questions that she suggested focus on our goals for the New Year… what changes will 2011 bring? So, on to the questions!

1. What’s the one thing you vow to learn or do in 2011 to improve your blog? There are many things that I would like to improve upon in 2011. I won’t list them all here, but I have to pick at least two: improving both my HTML and SEO skills. I am a complete novice when it comes to HTML and SEO, and although I learned a lot in 2010, there is still so much left for me to explore. Learning more HTML will allow me to make additional (fun! useful! unique!) improvements to my blog template, while improving my knowledge of SEO will hopefully increase both my blog traffic and rankings. There is so much more I need to learn, but I think both of these are a great place to start.

2. What did you learn about blogging in 2010 that you plan to put into practice next year? Wow, what didn’t I learn this year? Seeing that I was a blogging-virgin until June, everything I learned this year has been invaluable.

• I learned that I don’t have to post every day – quality will always triumph over quantity!
• I learned that being true to yourself and your voice leads to better content and increased readership.
• I learned that I should never be afraid to try something new or tackle a subject that has already been done a million times, as long as I am passionate about it.
• I learned that my growing relationships with my readers and fellow bloggers is truly what makes this worthwhile for me.
• I learned that commenting is the key to growth: the growth of your blog and the growth of your relationships. Without commenting, both of these will flounder.

I hope to improve in all of these areas in 2011 and continue to grow as a blogger.

3. Do you have any high-level goals for your blog in the coming year? Monetization? More comments? More connections with other bloggers? A new template? I think I am just going to take one day at a time and see where it leads me. Yes, I do have thoughts in my head about monetization and collaborations with other bloggers. I want to continue improving my layout. I want to increase my readership and the number of comments I receive. I hope to work on all of these things in 2011, but mostly, I want to focus on strengthening the relationships I have already established with my readers and fellow bloggers, and establishing these relationships with others.

When I began blogging I was an island – I was blogging for me, and me alone. Although this is still true to some extent – blogging is still a creative outlet for me, it is still my passion – the blogging community and my growing relationships within the Style Nation are what keeps me coming back day after day. That is what I want to focus on most.

4. If you could collaborate with one other blogger within your sphere of influence in 2011, who would you like to collaborate with, and what would you like to collaborate on? I can’t really answer this question in detail without writing a book, so I’ll keep it brief instead. There are so many talented bloggers out there that I would love to work with, for so many different reasons. I feel like I wouldn’t know where to begin. It’s no secret how much I respect Vahni from grit and glamour, Katy Rose from Modly Chic, Kristy Eléna from Vogue Gone Rogue, Casee Marie from The Girl Who Stole The Eiffel Tower, and A Brit Greek, so they would be at the top of my list. I would love to work with each of them, but they are just the very tip of that iceberg!

5. What do you plan to do to support other bloggers next year? This area is one where I am still learning and trying to figure out how I can best support the blogging community. As I mentioned above, I think the relationships we have with one another are so very important and I want to continue growing those. I want to continue supporting others by sharing links to their wonderful posts via twitter or my own blog. I want to hold more blog events, like the one that I am doing tomorrow, because I think it’s a great way to support one another.  I am re-evaluating my guest post series, to see how I might be able to improve it.

I plan to do more, but I am still working on ideas… what are some ideas you have? I’d love to hear some of your thoughts where this is concerned.

Finally, I just want to say thank you, once again, to each of you for making this SUCH an amazing year for me.  This blog has been a shining light in my life the past few months, and for that I will be forever grateful.  Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, and Happy New Year!

Image via Alderbrook Resort & Spa

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

Hi everyone! Before I get into this weeks Friend Friday topic, I need to formally thank Vahni of grit and glamour for the unbelievable honor she bestowed on me yesterday. I don’t know if you have seen her post yet, but Vahni took the time put together a year-end “best of” list of blogs that she believes made a significant impact in the blogosphere this year. You know how whenever you watch the Academy Awards, everyone always says “it was simply an honor to be nominated?” Well, in this case, it would simply have been an honor to even be considered. It was beyond on honor to be selected for inclusion amongst all the other fabulous bloggers that I deeply respect.  However, for Vahni to actually name me as her choice for G &G Blogger of the Year is incomprehensible to me. I am still reeling from shock, and I still feel like I am living a dream.

Let me try to put this in perspective. Getting this accolade from Vahni – who, in my opinion, is undeniably the true Blogger of the Year for her passion, intelligence, talent, and friendship. She is the type of blogger I aspire to be one day. It is a bit like getting an award from your idol. Actually, it is JUST like getting an award from your idol, because Vahni has been, and continues to be, an inspiration to me and pushes me to consistently improve.  I strive to be more like her, so that I might one day make an impact on the blogosphere that might be similar to her own.  So, thank you Vahni – you truly have no idea how much this means to me. I am honored, humbled, and completely overwhelmed! The Holidays are a time of giving, and Vahni gave me the best present I could have asked for yesterday!

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Happy Holidays!

This week’s Friend Friday topic is a bit different from the usual and focuses on Holiday traditions. In my family, the Holidays come a bit later than most of yours. I’ve mentioned this in the past, but for those of you that are not aware, my brother and I are actually first generation Americans. My parents moved to the Cleveland area in the 1970s. Our family is Serbian Orthodox, which means that we follow the Julian calendar for religious holidays in lieu of the Gregorian calendar. As such, our Christmas (which we call “Božić”) actually falls on January 7th. Other than the date, most of the traditions we follow are likely similar to yours, with some minor differences here and there. So let’s get on to these questions!

1. What is your favorite holiday memory? Is it wrong to say that I actually don’t have one memory that stands out from the rest? Although we have some distant cousins that live in Ohio, other than my immediate family, the rest of my relatives are either still in Serbia or in Australia. This means that we never had the huge family gatherings that so many are used to having at this time of the year. Instead, Christmas at my house has always been about the 4 of us. It’s about celebrating one another and toasting to a new year. If I would have to pick a favorite holiday memory, I would have to pick the memories I have of my brother and I growing up. Laughing. Goofing off. We have always been close, and so many of my favorite memories do focus on that, even now. We are just goofy when we get together

2. Were you ever a victim of those family Christmas party photo shoots? What do you think about them now? Care to share an old photo? Of course! Wasn’t everyone subjected to those photos? In our house especially, considering that all the aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents were literally across the globe, we always had to take tons of photos during Christmas. Then we had to send them to everyone so they could see how we had grown from the prior year. I think most of us (myself included) hate the posed photo shoots. Waiting for the camera timer to go off. Taking multiple shots just in case one didn’t turn out or someone blinked (side note: the invention of the digital camera is a great thing). Wearing your Christmas outfits. They were necessary though, and although I hated them then, I love looking at the photos now that we are grown. Unfortunately I don’t have any of those here, but I do have a couple of shots of my brother and I when we were really young during the holidays. Check out the goofiness!

me and my brother, circa the 70s

a little older, but still goofy

3. What’s the best Christmas gift you ever gave? Without a doubt, volunteering in the children’s ward of hospital. It’s been a few years since I have done this, but without a doubt, spending time with those kids and bringing a bit of joy to them and their families was priceless. The best gift you can give is one of hope, and just being there gave those kids hope.

4. Craziest/funniest holiday family tradition: Our holidays stay pretty traditional, so we don’t have any particularly funny or crazy things, although this one might seem a bit odd to most of you. Part of the traditional Christmas fare is a homemade round loaf of bread that is called a česnica. When the dough is being kneaded, the woman of those house sneaks some coins into the dough, and then bakes it that way. At dinner the bread is “broken” by everyone, and whoever find the coins is supposed to have a year full of good luck and prosperity.

Another tradition that may sound a bit crazy (but is actually traditional!) happens on the three Sundays before Christmas. Serbs don’t traditionally exchange gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Most do anyways, including my family, but we also follow the “real” tradition. Each of the three Sundays preceding Christmas are given a name (roughly translated into Children’s Day, Mother’s Day, and Father’s day) and gift giving occurs in the form of a “ransom.” In the olden days, on the morning of Children’s Day, for example, the parents would use a scarf to tie their kids to a chair. The children would know this was coming and have a present ready that would serve as the ransom payment so they would be freed. Same thing would happen on Mother’s and Father’s Day – the kids would tie up their parent, who would have to give them a present in order to be freed. Nowadays all you have to do is show a scarf, and the person instantly whips out the presents. It definitely a bit different from what you might do, but it basically means we get a couple presents early!

5. What is your favorite type of Christmas cookie? This is another place where my answers will likely be different. My favorite Christmas desserts are also traditional Serbian cookies. The first is called tulumbe and they are a dough-based dessert that is poured (soaked) with a sweet syrup. Yummo!

Tulumbe, Image via palachinka blog

The second is just a mixture of cookies, most of which you don’t have to bake. They range from chocolate to walnut to coffee to coconut and vanilla flavors. A couple of samples are below.

Rafaelo, Image via Palachinka Blog

Walnut and Rum balls, Image via Palachinka Blog

What about you? What are some of your favorite Holiday traditions?

Finally, a quick message to all of my readers. Thank you for an unbelievable few months. When I began blogging I had no idea what this experience would be like, and what joy it would bring to my life. I am thankful that I have had this opportunity to get to know you, and am truly humbled by your support. So, here I am coming out of the shadows just a bit to say Happy Holidays to you all!

My wish for each of you is health, happiness and laughter during this Holiday season and for the New Year. No matter how you celebrate, may your days be joyful and full of love!

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

Each week, one of the things I look forward to most is Friend Friday.  I wait with anticipation to learn what the questions will be, and eagerly get to work on my response as soon as I am able.

Until this week.

This week I have been stalling.

It has nothing to do with the quality of the topic at hand.  On the contrary, reader connectedness is one of the most important parts of blogging.  Scratch that.  Reader connectedness is the most important part of blogging.  Connecting with others is what this is all about.  An individual doesn’t have to start a blog in order to be creative.  They can put their thoughts together in a personal journal.  They can write a book.   They don’t have to channel their creativity out on the internet in a blog.  We do that – I did that – because we wanted to form those connections.  I wanted to share my experiences.  I wanted to form bonds and establish a sense of togetherness.  Understanding.  Connectedness.  I don’t think I even realized it at the time, but that is what compelled me to start Beautifully Invisible.

Image via Google Images

So why have I been stalling when I know how important reader connectedness really is?  Simple.

I am ashamed of myself.

I know I have been lacking in this department recently.  I knew it before this topic was chosen this week, but having it brought to the forefront has just made it all the more evident.  I haven’t been connecting with my readers as much as I like to as of late, and I am not pleased with myself.  So I stalled writing this a bit.

But here I am, taking the bull by the horn, so to speak, and facing the topic head on!  Maybe this is exactly what I need to kick myself and get back on track.  So, on to the questions…

1. How important do you think reader connectedness is to the success of your blog? As I mentioned above, I think reader connectedness is the most important element when it comes to the success of my blog.  Everyone always talks about how new bloggers often become obsessed with their blog statistics.  The number of visitors, page views, bounce rate, etc. etc.  Although I admit I went through that phase myself, now it’s all about comments.  I love reading the comments left by my readers because they are the true measure of how engaging your content truly is.

A very small percentage of blog readers actually comment on posts.  This article on DIY Themes refers to this as the 90: 9: 1 principal:

90% of readers lurk on your blog quietly while consuming your content

9% of readers are editors and comment regularly

1% of readers are the fanatical people who leave page-long comments after each post.

That 10% of readers are the ones that truly give you an idea of how well you are engaging your readers.  How interesting your content is.  How likely someone is to come back and visit again after they stumble onto your blog.

What the old adage – “If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?”

What about this: If a blogger writes and no one reads it, does the blog truly exist? Of course the blog physically exists, that can’t be questioned.  But if you aren’t connecting with anyone and if you aren’t making a difference with your writings, don’t you feel a bit like that tree that fell without a sound?

A blog with no readers is truly more of a journal.  You are writing for yourself, and yourself alone.  And there is nothing wrong with that.

But having a blog with readers that connect with you, and you with them, is what this is really all about.  It is what makes blogging worthwhile.  I am thankful to each of you – whether you comment or not – for being here, for reading my ramblings, and for connecting.  You are the reason I do this.

Image via And I Walk Alone

2. What do you do to draw readers in and create that writer-reader bond? I think this is a question that I would actually love to have my readers answer.  I’d love to hear what draws YOU in to the blog.  What makes you feel connected?

From my point of view, I break the rules.  I run a style blog, but don’t post images of myself.  I write long narratives.  I write about controversial topics.  My blog isn’t designed to catch the interest of the person simply looking for a pretty photo.  It will probably be over-looked by someone who typically just skims content.  It is meant to draw the attention of people who are passionate about certain topics.  People who like to be mentally-engaged.

Image via Cartoon Church

I try to draw my readers in by focusing on topics that naturally create conversation.  Topics that often need to be explored further.  I encourage comments and discussion.

I mentioned above how important receiving comments is to a blogger because it is a direct measure of reader engagement.  Responding to reader comments is equally important.   Each reader who takes the time to comment on your blog is trying to connect with you (unless they are strictly fishing for new readers themselves, which is fairly obvious).  They are establishing a relationship with you and your blog.  The easiest way to show them that their voice has been heard is to respond to their comments.   To visit their blogs.  To respond to their posts.  That is how you forge those relationships.

Understandably, their are some bloggers out there with huge followings that simply can not find the time to respond to each comment and visit numerous blogs.  However, many of them are able to find ways to remain connected with their readers.  Tiffany from I am Style-ish, who has a following I can only dream of, posted this in a comment on my blog just the other day:

“I know that reading/commenting is essential to being part of the blogger community but because of my time constraints, it’s something that I only do once in awhile but I do keep an active participation in my other social networks just so I still feel like I’m interacting with my readers and blogger friends.”

That is how you forge those relationships.  You find out what works for you and your particular circumstances.  You find a way to interact and communicate, be it comments, social networks, or both.

3. What is one way you could improve this connection? I mentioned in my introduction that I was feeling ashamed of myself when it came to this week’s topic.  I have definitely dropped the ball on connecting with my readers as of late.  It wasn’t intentional – I didn’t wake up one morning and say “you know what, I don’t care about my readers anymore.”  Quite the contrary.  I care immensely about my readers.  I try to show that by responding to each comment I receive on this blog.   I *do* respond to each comment on this blog, although at times it may take me a week to find the time to adequately do so.

The place I have been lacking as of late is in commenting on other blogs.  I still read all the blogs in my growing blogroll, but I have been commenting less and less.  Often I say to myself “I’ll come back later to comment” and then days or even weeks pass by.  It has nothing to do with the other bloggers or their content – the blame is solely on me and my inadequate time management.  This is why I am ashamed.  I know I should be doing this more.  I am not a super-blogger.  I have the time.  I just need to make it.   Perhaps that means re-evaluating my blogroll and weeding some things out.  Perhaps that means dedicating some time each week solely to commenting.

This is another place where I will reach out to you, my readers – what do you think I could be doing better?

4. Is there a blogger you think does a great job creating that writer- reader bond?  Why? I think there are many bloggers that do this, regardless of the size of their readership. I have a few I could name, but instead, let’s go through a simple exercise.

• Think about your blogroll for a second.
• Now, think about the ones that are daily reads.  The ones that you check regardless of how busy you are.  Regardless of what is going on in your life.
• Are these are the bloggers that you feel the most connected to?
• Are these the blogs that resonate with you most?

My guess is, yes.  And it is probably safe to say that they are the ones you would list if you were answering this question.

5. What do you do to cultivate new readers? How do you get them to your site in the first place? There are a multitude of ways to get someone to your site.  But how do you get them to stay?  To come back?  I think content really is the key when it comes to cultivating new readers.  Your content might not be a good fit with every person who stumbles across your blog, but it will resonate with some of them.  The people who feel a connection with something you wrote are the people that will become your new readers.

How do you get them to your site?  There are countless ways:

• Network, network, network.
  • Independent Fashion Bloggers is full of great resources and allows you to submit your best link of the week for consideration in their Links à la Mode: The IFB Weekly Roundup.
  • Friend Friday is a wonderful group for so many reasons.  The questions tackled each week are thought-provoking and the group of bloggers involved continues to grow.
  • Check out sites like Bon Bon Rose Girls, Blog Catalog and Indie Style Media and see if they are a fit with your blog.
  • If you are a personal style blogger, their are countless forums and websites to engage in.  Do some research!
  • Use sites like Facebook and Twitter.
    • You can use these sites to not only promote your own blog, but also to promote other bloggers.  Read a post you particularly enjoyed?  Share it.  Stumble upon a blog you loved instantly? Promote it.
  • Stumble a few of your best posts.  Stumble posts by other bloggers.  In order for StumbleUpon to work well, you have to Stumble other content, not just your own!
• Support one another.  The best way to gain readers is to support other bloggers.
  • Share posts via social networking sites, as I mentioned above.
  • Comment on other sites.
  • Guest post (invite someone to guest post for you, or consider guest posting elsewhere).
  • Recognize other bloggers on your own blog, be it through a dedicated post or just a mention.

That being said, and I hope this doesn’t sound awful, but although I do the majority of the things I listed above, I don’t do them with the goal of gaining more readers in mind.  I do them because I enjoy doing them.  I do them because I feel like I am part of a community, and I like to support the others in it.  I do them because they challenge me to output decent content.

I do them because they come naturally.  I do them because I am thankful for the support I have.

Image via Google Images

What about you, how important is reader connectedness to you??

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

Blogger Burnout.

Type those words in “Google” and you’ll get over 550,000 results.

That’s an alarming number.

*queue freaky Twilight Zone music*

We all experience “burnout” syndrome at some point in time in our lives.  We get fatigued, suffer from mental and/or physical exhaustion and diminished interest.  Most of us likely associate it with our 9 – 5 lives, although sometimes you might feel “life” burnout as well.  In truth, you could feel it in all areas of your life (i.e.: shopping burnout, cooking burnout, gaming burnout, TV/film/music burnout).  It can, and does, happen.

Image via Reality Squared

The increased popularity of blogging has introduced a new type of burnout syndrome to our lives: blogger burnout.  Just yesterday I read a wonderful and timely IFB post on “Beating Blogger Burnout” by Vahni of grit and glamour.  In it, V describes a few of the most common signs/side effects of the syndrome as it relates to bloggers:

You’re dreading writing up that next post.

You can’t think of anything to write about—the dreaded blogger’s block.

You’ve begun posting less frequently.

You’ve been posting just for the sake of it, often posting content culled from other sources instead of your own original work.

Your posts have become more personal—and whiny.

You’ve lost “direction”; you don’t know what you are trying to accomplish with your blog.

You’re thinking of shutting down your blog because you just can’t keep up.

Blogger burnout is almost every blogger’s worst nightmare because it is virtually unavoidable.  If you are a blogger reading this, it will (or already has) happen to you.  The question is, how will you deal with it when it does?

Image via Cartoon Stock

This week’s Friend Friday deals with this very subject and was inspired by the unexpected closing of a blog many of us frequent.  Fashion Butter has long been one of my daily reads, so I was stunned to learn that Toni had decided to close her blog.  Although I don’t know her reasoning behind it (it may have nothing to do with burnout), I could relate to her decision because of my personal experiences with blogger burnout.

Shutting down Beautifully Invisible has crossed my mind more than once in recent weeks but I keep at it because I know it will pass.  I also know that other bloggers, including the ones I admire most, have likely gone through the same thing.   This last thought is actually quite comforting.  It’s nice to know that you aren’t alone in experiencing these symptoms, and it’s nice to know they will pass.

The moment that they don’t pass is the moment you need to think about moving on to something else.

Now, on to today’s questions:

1.  How many hours a week do you spend blogging? Has that number changed since you started blogging? I don’t typically track the hours I spend blogging, but I would guess it is typically between 15 and 20 hours a week (when I am regularly blogging).   That amount will lesson depending on the amount of “free” time I have available to me and whether or not I am experiencing any of the burnout symptoms we are talking about today.

When I first began blogging this number was far less.  At first my posts were less researched (more photoshoot, less editorial content), and I spent less time commenting on and visiting other blogs.  My hours spent have steadily increased as my content has become more editorial and as I began to interact more with other bloggers.

I’ve mentioned this before, but blogging doesn’t stop with your own personal blog and your posts.  It includes the time you put into the other blogs you frequent.  All of this – researching/writing/ editing your own blog and reading/commenting on other blogs – is a part of “blogging.”

2. There is always more you can do, write, read, comment on… how do you limit your time spent on these tasks? At the moment, I don’t really set a “limit” for myself. I do all of these things when I have time available to me.   Blogging isn’t my full time job.  I have a 9 – 5 (that is really more of a 8AM – 7PM) career.  I like to see my friends and loved ones as much as possible on weekends and such, so my blogging is “scheduled” around those things.

Work.. sleep... work... sleep (Image via Journey of a Serial Entrepreneur)

I use the term “scheduled” loosely.  I fit in my blogging when I can.  If I have some down time at work, I’ll either work on a post or try to get some reading/commenting in.  The majority of the time, however, it happens in the evening.  There has been many a night when I am up late blogging.  Lately, I begin my posts in the evening and have often found myself finishing them up in the morning or afternoon during my lunch hour.

No matter what, there are a few rules I try to live by:

• Don’t pressure yourself to post everyday.  3 or 4 times a week is enough.  Your readers will still be there.
• Don’t pressure yourself to stick to a schedule if it isn’t working for you.  Instead, blog when you are able to. You’ll be more productive and feel better about it.
• Blog when you are feeling motivated and passionate.
• Blog when you have something to say.  Never ever just blog for the sake of blogging.
• Take some time off if you need it.  Everyone needs a mental health day (or 2 or 3) on occasion.  Take them if you need them.  You’ll feel refreshed and re-energized when you do.

Image via Idaho Business Review

If you come up with a set of guidelines for yourself, you’ll find it helps with the “burnout”.

3. Have you experienced Blogger burnout yet? How have you dealt with that? I started answering this question with the words “even though my blog is still fairly young…” and stopped myself.   Why should I feel like I have to add a caveat about the age of my blog?  Blogger burnout isn’t something that is limited to established bloggers.  It is something that can happen to any of us, at any time.  It certainly has happened to me.

Image created by me.

Most of the writing I’ve read on the subject of Blogger Burnout discusses the symptoms/signs and offers advice on how to deal with it (or steps to prevent) it.  Something I don’t see much of is a look at the different types of blogger burnout.  Yes, I believe there are different types of blogger burnout, and I have experienced at least 3 of them!

• “Not Enough Time in the Day” Burnout:  if you are suffering from this type of burnout, it isn’t that you don’t want to write.  It isn’t that you don’t have ideas.  You haven’t lost your blogger mojo.  You simply don’t have the physical time to blog and participate in the blogosphere.  You feel like you should somehow make the time.  Sleep less.  Write faster.  Create extra hours in the day.  If only it were that easy.
• “Everyone Else Already Posted It” Burnout: sometimes you just feel like you have nothing to say.  Nothing new to add to the conversation.  Remember that great idea you had last week?  Well, while you were trying to find the time to blog about it, 3 other people beat you to it.  And they probably did it better than you would have.  What about that other idea?  Yup, that has been done to.  Could you have still written the post and made it interesting for your readers?  Depends.  If you aren’t suffering from burnout – yes!  You easily could have put your own spin on it.  If you are suffering from burnout – no.  Mentally you just aren’t committed, so you hit a wall.
• “My Personal Life is Getting in the Way” Burnout: This is my personal favorite.  If you knew me in the “real world”, you’d know that I wear my heart on my sleeve.  I have never been the type of person who has been able to separate my personal life from work.  What is happening in one impacts the other.  Always has, always will.  Blogging is no exception.  If my personal life is stressful, that stress carries into my blogging.  This is what I am experiencing right now.

  I apologize in advance for my whininess, but I am doing it for the sake of full disclosure.  I have mentioned my break-up in passing on the blog before.  I have mentioned how blogging has been a saving grace for me.  What I haven’t mentioned is how devastating the break-up truly has been to me.  What I haven’t mentioned is how today, 6 months later, I am still just as hurt and heartbroken as I was when my relationship ended.  What I haven’t mentioned is how every time I feel like I am finally healing and moving on, like clockwork he contacts me again.  The last time was on November 18th, my 35th birthday.  I used that contact as an opportunity to finally tell him to leave me alone, once and for all.  Hopefully he’ll listen.

  What does that have to do with blogging, you ask?  Since November 18th, my heart hasn’t been into blogging.  All of a sudden I feel like all my self-confidence has just evaporated.  I feel like I have nothing to say. I feel like I am a fraud, because I am talking about beauty and fashion and I feel neither beautiful nor fashionable.  I feel like I should just turn in the towel and close the blog, because who wants to read a fashion blog written by someone who feels that way?  Do You know when I don’t feel that way?  When I am actually blogging.  When I am actually blogging, I feel like I am in my element.  I feel good about myself and what I am doing.  It’s during the “off time” when I am not blogging that I question myself.

So yes, I have definitely experienced blogger burnout!

I deal with it by doing my best to follow the “rules” I listed in question 2.   I deal with it by reminding myself that this too shall pass.  I deal with it by working on my self-confidence.  I deal with it by writing as much as I can, which is what helps in this case. I deal with it by getting a massage. Going shopping. Being with loved ones. I deal with it best I can.

Image via Weddings & Honeymoons

4. This time of the year is always a lot busier than any other time. Will your blogging change as a result? I don’t anticipate my blogging changing much during the holidays.   I am Serbian Orthodox and we celebrate Christmas on January 7th instead of December 25th, so things should stay pretty consistent.  If anything, hopefully I’ll have some additional time to read and comment on other blogs!

5. Could you forsee a moment in which you are not blogging anymore?  How would you you identify that it’s time to walk away? This is a difficult question to answer because of what I said in Question 3.  Can I foresee a moment when I would stop blogging?  Yes.  Do I want that moment to become a reality?  No.

As I mentioned above, I think the time to move on from blogging is when the symptoms of blogger burnout don’t pass.  When you no longer have any desire to participate and contribute to the blogosphere.  When you are no longer passionate about it.  When it becomes a permanent chore instead of a creative outlet.

That is when you need to think about moving on.

Image via Google Images

What about you?  How have you dealt with blogger (or life) burnout?

Have you ever thought about throwing in the towel?

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here.

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series is quickly becoming an invaluable source of information for both new and seasoned fashion bloggers. Each week the posts contain valuable – and often varied – opinions and thoughts on important subjects.  The past few weeks a number of the posts written by contributors have even made it into IFB’s Links à la Mode.

This week’s subject is one of significant importance – copyright. We’ve discussed copying in the fashion industry, but this post deals with copyright infringement in the blogging world. Katy came up with the topic for a number of different reasons, including photoshoots clearly inspired by other bloggers, and a DIY recipe reprinted by another blogger with few changes.  This led to the question of what is – and is not – acceptable “copying” in the blogosphere. When is it “fair use,” and when does it become copyright infringement?

This topic reminded me of something I had recently read about.  Fashion Gone Rogue is one of those websites that every fashion blogger is aware of. Even if it isn’t a daily read, at some point in time something has likely drawn you to its pages. It is evident that the site’s curator, Joanna Gillespie, receives her content directly from industry insiders because she is generally the first to post editorial images from any given publication.  If anyone has it, chances are it is her.  She attributes her images and always, without fail, links back to the appropriate source.  And she doesn’t just reprint editorial images.  Each post includes some type of commentary on the shoot.

Imagine my surprise when I learned that she had received a cease and desist email from Trunk Archive earlier this year due to one of the images she was using on her site. One of the original photographers had taken issue with an image of Lily Donaldson being using in the header of the site and a representative of the company sent her this message:

“I was very disheartened to see the Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin photograph of Lily Donaldson incorporated into the design of your website. Clearly you never asked for permission nor received permission to use this image from either the artists, their agent or their licensing agency…It surprises me that a site that purports to support and admire fashion photography would engage in such blatant copyright infringement. How do you expect this industry to survive if sites such as yours do not respect the basic premise of artist copyright?

We ask that you remove this image from your website immediately. In addition, we require payment of a $2,000 copyright infringement fee. Please remit payment today to Trunk Archive, at the address below. If the image remains as part of your logo by this time tomorrow, and if we have not received a check from you by July 6th, 2010, our lawyers will be in immediate contact.”

Joanna immediately removed the image and put the site on hiatus while she dealt with the issue at hand. According to this blog post on the fashionista.com, she happily removed the image – it was the request for $2,000 that left her baffled.  Ultimately the situation was resolved, but, in my opinion, if this could happen to Joanna, it could happen to anyone.

It could easily have happened to me when I first began blogging. My original site header incorporated images of Daria Werbowy along with some of my own nature photography. It was striking, and I loved the way it looked.  The last thing on my mind at the time was copyright infringement.  It never even crossed my mind that Mario Testino could, if he wanted, sue me for incorporating his work into the design of my site.  But he could have done exactly that had he desired.

I think this was also the main issue that Fashion Gone Rogue had to deal with – the fact that she was posting editorials wasn’t what caught the attention of the photographer in question.  It was the fact that a particular image was incorporated into the design of her site. According to copyright law, that is not fair use.  And the same thing could have happened to me.  Look at your site.  Have you incorporated any copyrighted images into your design?  If so, you may want to rethink that.  Stat.

This was a very long introduction into this week’s Friend Friday questions, but let’s get to it!

1. What are the ‘unwritten rules’ about copying content that we bloggers should all abide by? Unwritten? How about written? Most bloggers have some sort of copyright or creative commons license indicated on their blog (and if they don’t, they should).  First, abide by the requirements of that license.  Second, even if no copyright is indicated, the work of that blogger is still covered by copyright law.

It’s simple really:

• Don’t copy content (be it written or photographic) and claim it as your own. End of story. No one likes that. Ever.
• If you refer to someone’s work, credit and link back to them. Not only will it give you more credibility,you will also gain the respect of that other blogger.
• If something you do was inspired by another blogger, be it an outfit post, a new blog series, or a recipe, credit that person for the inspiration. V from Grit and Glamour did this just recently in one of her outfit posts. She was wearing something that was inspired by Kristy Eléna from Vogue Gone Rogue.Would V have worn that outfit even if she had never set eyes on Kristy Eléna’s blog? Maybe. Probably. But the fact of the matter is the outfit reminded HER of Kristy Eléna, so she was respectful enough to indicate that.  Respect, people. That is what this is all about – respecting the other blogger.

Image via Vogue Gone Rogue

Image via grit and glamour

2. They say imitation is the highest form of flattery. But when it a post imitation and when is it copying? A post is copying when it is a replica of the original post. If you can’t contribute any original content to the post and if you can’t add your own voice to the post it is copying. If you claim it as your own, but it is clearly imitation, that is copying.

In the United States, “fair use” is an exemption of copyright law that allows people to provide commentary on, parody, satire, report on, etc. something without getting permission from the author. If you are doing any of these things, and attributing your original source, you are providing some type of original content, and fair use dictates you can legally use that content.

This is why I am able to post images of editorials I love – I am protected by the fair use clause. I don’t claim any of the images as my own, they aren’t incorporated into the design of my site, and I don’t profit from them.

In my opinion, imitation = inspiration. Anything more than that and you are copying.

3. Taking another blogger’s idea (perhaps for an outfit, or DIY tutorial) is pretty common in the blogging world. Do you think it is necessary to credit the original source? Absolutely. See answers 1 and 2 above.

4. How have you improved your blog by comparing it to other bloggers? Have you made changes due to something you have seen others doing? Others bloggers certainly influence my own blog.

• I am using the Thesis theme on WordPress because numerous blogs I frequent use it. Do I use it because I want to be just like The Coveted or Grit and Glamour? No. I use it because it fits my needs. Their blogs just introduced me to it.

• I take note of elements on other blogs that are aesthetically pleasing to me (white space, social networking buttons, etc.) and apply them to my own blog.  Yet my blog is MY blog. It doesn’t look like anyone else’s.

• I love it when bloggers recognize one another.  Christina of Profresh Style has her “Reader Appreciation” posts, V of Grit and Glamour has her “Sunday Coffee” series, and Casee Marie of  The Girl Who Stole the Eiffel Tower has her “Weekend Reads.”   Tanvi of The Fabulous Life of the Not-So-Rich Infamous inspired me to start my own Guest Post series.  I receive email requests from random individuals asking if they can do guest posts on this site, but I have chosen to focus the series on bloggers I have relationships with. It is my way of recognizing bloggers I respect.

Image via Profresh Style

Image via grit and glamour

Image via The Girl Who Stole the Eiffel Tower

Image via Fabulous Life of the Not-So-Rich Infamous

Those are just a few of the ways other bloggers have influenced me.  There is nothing wrong with getting an idea from another blogger, be it for an outfit post, editorial post, photographic settings, blog series, etc.  But don’t just copy what they do. Run with it and make it your own.

5. Have you ever had one of your posts copied by another blogger or publication? How did you handle the situation? Not as far as I know. If that did happen I would start by contacting the blogger/publication and go from there.

What I have had done to me involves my personal photography. Specifically my concert photography. I have had images I posted in a member-only forum stolen and sold for profit on EBAY. Learning that was devastating to me. All I can do now is monitor ebay and, if I catch someone, report the incident so that the images are removed. I can’t do anything about the images that have already been sold because I don’t have the resources I’d need to do that.

Respect everyone’s content – be it written, visual, or auditory.  Flat out copying is just a form of stealing.

What about you – has anyone ever copied your content?  If so, what did you do?

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Independent Fashion Bloggers has some great resources on this topic:

• For information on Fair Use, check out this great post.
• For information on the types of photography you can use with no copyright concerns, click here.

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To see what other bloggers are saying about this topic, click here;

For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.

vintage deodorant ad, circa 1935

On October 31st, 2010, the New York Times published a piece entitled “The Great Unwashed” which featured a number of individuals who are a part of a new “natural” movement.  Some of these individuals have chosen to forgo (or moderate) the usage of shampoo, soap and even showers, while others never wear deodorant.

The article begins with the statement “A DAILY shower is a deeply ingrained American habit. Most people would no sooner disclose they had not showered in days than admit infidelity.” This is undoubtedly true.   Showers have long been a part of the American lifestyle, and the term “the great unwashed” used to refer to something else entirely.

In the 1991 book “Washing the Great Unwashed“, Marilyn Thornton Williams writes that “By 1897… public baths were accepted as one of the important services which progressive American cities must provide for their poorer citizens. Personal cleanliness had become a necessity, not only for social acceptability and public health but also as a symbol of middle-class status, good character, self-respect, and membership in the civic community. If slum tenements failed to provide the poor with bathing facilities so that they could attain the proper standards of cleanliness, then cities must provide public baths to wash the great unwashed. Cleanliness had become a right of all citizens.”

Although Williams’ book is really a study on the advent of public baths, it also illustrates the importance and desire for cleanliness that pervades our society.  A walk through any store deodorant, shampoo, or soap aisle  illustrates that this desire for cleanliness is something that has not faded over the years.  If anything, it seems to grow stronger.

According to the 1935 “Odorono” ad above:

“The care you give to that little closed in hollow of your underarm can make an important difference in your social acceptability.”

Do you think that still holds true today?  Or do you think that our “natural scent” is becoming more and more acceptable?  What about after a workout?  Or on a particularly hot day?  What about when you are on a date with someone new, or a longtime beau?  When you are leaning in for that first kiss?

Is natural the way to go?  Apparently, for some, it is.

Pig-Pen was always one of my favorite characters

But is the “unwashed” movement just a fad, or is this movement here to stay?

1. The move to do away with soap, shampoo and deodorant has been growing in popularity in the last year. What are your thoughts on this trend? Umm…. it scares me?  Just kidding.  Kind of.  I think that, like all trends, this will work for some and not others.   Personally, I could never imagine a life without soap, shampoo (conditioner too!) and deodorant.  I have to admit that out of all three things listed, it’s the idea of foregoing deodorant that seems ludicrous to me.  Have I ever forgotten to put on deodorant?  Sure, doesn’t everyone on occasion?  But to intentionally decide to stop wearing it?  No way.

In the NYT article mentioned above, they share that for 55-year old Jennifer Palmer, the chief executive of Osea skin-care:

“a soapy washcloth under her arms, between her legs and under her feet is all she needs to get “really clean.” On the go, underarm odor is wiped away with a sliced lemon.”

Again, that might work for some, but not others.  I know I wouldn’t feel clean with that regime.  It will be interesting to see how long this trend sticks around.  Movements toward more “organic” products and a more “green” lifestyle have been growing for a long time, but this is something else entirely.  There are ways to be “green” without giving up these things.

Image via cartoonstock

The NYT piece also suggests that some choose to follow this lifestyle because of the “good bacteria” that naturally lives on our skin.

“Of late, researchers have discovered that just as the gut contains good bacteria that help it run more efficiently, so does our skin brim with beneficial germs that we might not want to wash down the drain. “Good bacteria are educating your own skin cells to make your own antibiotics,” said Dr. Richard Gallo, chief of the dermatology division at the University of California, San Diego, and “they produce their own antibiotics that kills off bad bacteria.””

The existence of “good bacteria” on our skin isn’t a new discovery – it was something I learned about in my science classes as a child. I believe that over-washing (i.e.: standing under the shower spray for an hour) and using extremely hot water are bad for the skin. I also agree that the products found in some soaps and shampoos and deodorants can be bad for the skin.  That just means I do (or should do) more research into the products I use.

2. Be honest how often do you wash your own hair? I have long, thick, fine hair that gets oily if I don’t wash it every day, so that is what I do.  Every. Day.  (with a few exceptions).  My scalp gets oily if I don’t wash my hair with shampoo every day, so I make sure to do so.  The only time this isn’t the case is if I get it colored.  On those occasions, I’ll use Klorane Brand dry shampoo for 2 or 3 days, and then go back to my regular wash routine.

I wonder if Alexander Skarsgard is using shampoo?

3. Have you tried to go the more natural route by forgoing shampoo? What happened? Or would you be tempted to try it? I did try it, and it doesn’t work for me.  When I first started coloring my hair in college I tried to wash my hair 3 days instead of 7.  I would still rinse with water when I showered, but didn’t use shampoo.  As I shared above, my scalp gets oily, and having fine hair – it looked awful.  Then I tried 5 days instead of 7.  Same travesty.  So now I stick to the routine I mentioned above.

Image via Google Images

Truthfully, I could get away with only washing it 4 or 5 days a week if I used dry shampoo in my “off days” but I don’t want to do that.  I’m not convinced dry shampoo is any better for my hair than shampooing in the shower, although it definitely comes in handy on the days when you might not have time for that shampoo first thing in the morning or after your workout!

4. What products do you use and have you ever gone with more organic alternatives? Through my childhood and teens, I always used Pantene products.  When I entered college I began using AVEDA because I loved the smell and it made my hair manageable and shiny without feeling weighed down. I also liked the fact the line is a bit more “natural” than others and tries to avoid any unnecessary chemical additives.

Today, I generally use sulfate and paraben-free shampoos and conditioners.  I mostly use Alterna TEN and David Babaii for Wildaid products.  The Alterna product is expensive, but a little goes a long way, and my hair has never looked better or been healthier.

I also use a clarifying shampoo once a week and, on occasion, still use AVEDA products, especially for styling.  However, my styling routine has changed since I began using MoroccanOil.  Lately, that is the only styling product I need!

As for deodorants – I use Secret. Body washes – Korres. Soaps – Dove. I am not that picky on these.
5. What about that daily shower? Would you forgo that opting to shower three times a week instead? Absolutely not.  I work out 5 days a week, and there is no way I would ever forgo a shower following a workout.  I’ve even been known to shower more than once a day (gasp!) because of a late workout.  Hey, it happens.

Showers keep me clean and fresh and they help to wake me up in the morning!  The only way I think I could ever forgo showers is if I absolutely had no choice. For example, if I was stranded on a deserted island or in a third world country where water (or plumbing) was scarce.

I would consider giving up daily showers for you...

What I would love, however, is a “greener” way to shower.  Right now, I use a Jonathan Product Water Purification System in my shower (which I swear it also has made my hair healthier).  It’s a nice start, but it is nothing like the experience I had when I visited Roatan, Honduras in March.

My shower at the Santé Wellness Center and Spa was the best I have ever experienced in my life, even though I had to make it a quick one.  Why?  Because they collect, store and use rainwater on the grounds.  I will never forget the purity of that water and how it felt on my skin.  Pure heaven.  I wish I could set up that type of system here, but I just don’t see it happening…

What do you think of these new trends?  Are they here to stay, or just a fad?

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This week’s Friend Friday topic is a bit more informal.  Instead of focusing on the ins and outs of fashion and blogging, this time Katy switched the focus to us as individuals.  Participants are to share 10 random facts about ourselves  that people may be surprised to know.

I almost didn’t participate this week because I feel like I have actually shared the most interesting things about me here and here.  I wasn’t sure I could really come up with ten more, but here they are!

1. I am a film fanatic.  I have been known to hit the festival circuit over the years and have been fortunate enough to attend both the Toronto and Tribeca Film Festivals.  Being a Cleveland girl, I have also gone to the Cleveland International Film Festival every year for as long as I can remember.  Some might call me a film snob, but I don’t discriminate between blockbusters, independent releases, classics, etc.  I love to watch them all.  If I am flipping channels on the TV, there are certain movies that will make me stop every time:

2.  Some of you may already know this, but I have a crush on Marshall Mathers III, aka Eminem.  I have had a crush on him since the first time I heard “My Name Is…” in 1999. Don’t judge.

3.  My first real Halloween costume was a plastic Wonder Woman outfit. Do you remember those?  Before the days of the fancy-shmancy Halloween costumes children often have today, we wore bed sheets and went out like ghosts, or wore plastic costumes.  I found this photo online of someone else, but this is the same costume I wore! Classy, right? No matter how badly I wanted to, I just didn’t look like Lynda Carter…

4.  I have yet to find a television show that I love as much as I loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Every week, I would watch Buffy and her friends battle the demons and/or vampires that served as an allegory to the trials and tribulations of growing up. Genius. Pure genius. And the writing? Phenomenal.

5. I jumped out of a plane once. It was a tandem jump, so I was strapped to a professional skydiver who knew what he was doing. I was fine up until the moment that I stepped to the edge of the plane. We jumped, and then I decided I wanted to change my mind. Too late. I swore all the way down.

Then, after surviving, I wanted to do it again!

This is exactly what sky-diving was like for me...

6. I hate the idea of strangers touching me. It makes me uncomfortable and twitchy. As a result, I have always shied away from professional massages because the very idea of them freaked me out. That is, until this past March. During our vacation, we ended up going to the Santé Wellness Center and Spa in Roatan, Honduras. I had my first real massage that day, and it was – in a word – heavenly.

I don't think I would enjoy a Spock massage...

7. The nicest compliment I ever received was from a former ex-bf who said that I looked like Laetitia Casta. We are both brunettes. We both have blue eyes. We have similar coloring. Unfortunately, that is where the resemblance ends! Clearly, my ex needed glasses, but nevertheless, I smile every time I think of that!

I wish I looked like this...

8. Although I enjoy Strawberry Twizzlers, I hate black licorice with a passion. I can’t stand the taste (I think it’s the anise). I can’t stand the smell. Yuck.

Since I am talking about dislikes, I can also add that I don’t like the taste of rum in desserts. It can be a pretty common ingredient in Serbian desserts, and for the longest time my mother would try to trick me and say there wasn’t any in whatever it was she had made. Unfortunately for her, I could always tell. I could taste it. I could smell it. And I didn’t like it. Still don’t.

Yet I absolutely LOVE Tortuga Rum Cakes. I know, it makes no sense.

Yummo!

9.  I know every single word. to the songs “Baby Got Back” and “The Humpty Dance.”  Can you sing along?

10.  I love watching scary movies.  I’m not taking about slasher movies like the usual Freddy and Jason flicks.  I am talking scary, psychological, get into your head and mess with your mind movies.  My favorites include:

What are some interesting facts that people may not know about you?

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For more info on ModlyChic’s Friend Friday series, click here.